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I was expecting at least the rudiments of an interview, the day I finally plucked up the nerve to answer the vaguely worded advertisement at the back of the local free paper; decode the shadowed suggestions and hints that the dark voice who answered the phone let slip; and then show up at the cafe one wet afternoon. Yes, I was expecting an interview. Instead, I got a lecture. A very, very short lecture, because he’s not a man to use three words when a simple grunt will suffice. But, a lecture nonetheless.“Three rules. No talking, no time wasting, and no mess on the floor. Spit, swallow, smear it on your skin, I don’t care what you do. But I don’t want to see any cum on the carpets, none on the walls, and none on your clothes. Any questions?”I shook my head. He’d already shown me to my “office,” as he called it, a three foot square cubicle with pale lilac walls and, at varying heights on three of them, a series of holes. Through which the johns would poke their peckers, in expectation. ”Rory decided to take me at my word, running his fingers through his hair and striking a pose. They both broke up in laughter, slapping each other on the back in greeting.Once they had finished laughing, the bus was just pulling into the bus stop. Rory apologised when he sat with another friend who was already on the bus. I was just happy that he had even acknowledged my existence at all.Due to the introduction and tour I had received prior to school starting. I already knew where my homeroom was, so I made my way directly there after departing the bus. Apart from Rory I wasn’t interested in trying to talk to any of the other students I had met in the past few weeks, most seemed to be jerks anyway.The bus had delivered us to school in plenty of time, but it wasn’t that long before the first bell rang.When I got to my homeroom I decided I didn’t want to sit anywhere which was considered a stereotypical position, front for geeks and nerds, back for the jocks and the cool crowd. Not.
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